Monthly Archives: December 2014
Plot: When podcaster Wallace travels to Canada to interview someone, he winds up meeting a strange man named Howe who has many stories to tell about his past life during his interview. Wallace wakes up the next day finding out Howe isn’t the person he thought he was. Howe has plans to surgically and mentally turn Wallace into a walrus.
Review: Tusk is a horror film written and directed by Kevin Smith, based on a story from his SModcast podcast.
When podcaster Wallace (Justin Long) travels to Canada to interview someone, his plans don’t go well as the interviewee has unfortunately passed on. He ends up meeting a strange man named Howe (Michael Parks) who has many stories to tell about is past life. But halfway through the interview, Wallace passes out, and wakes the next day to discover that Howe isn’t the person he thought he was.
Howe has plans to surgically and mentally turn Wallace into something from his past.. A walrus.
This film would be comedy slash horror, and once again Justin Long brings the goods to the table. Michael Parks plays the part of Howe, a psychopath with too many delusions of aquatic mammals (especially walrus’), Haley Joel Osment is Wallace’s best mate – Teddy – and co-host of their podcast show, and Genesis Rodriguez is Wallace’s girlfriend, Ally.
When the shit hits the fan – and it does – Wallace finds himself the victim of psychopath Howe, who is intent on surgically transforming a human into a walrus. Time is running out for Wallace. Will Ally and Teddy get to their man in time in this film? Ah… no.
If you like previous work by Kevin Smith, you will enjoy this one.
Verdict: I am the walrus…. (Beatles 🙂 )
My Rating: 6 out of 10
The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2014 annual report for this blog.
Here’s an excerpt:
A New York City subway train holds 1,200 people. This blog was viewed about 5,900 times in 2014. If it were a NYC subway train, it would take about 5 trips to carry that many people.
Plot: Her name is Dinah. In the Bible her life is only hinted at during a brief and violent detour within the more familiar chapters about her father, Jacob, and his dozen sons in the Book of Genesis. Told through Dinah’s eloquent voice, this sweeping miniseries reveals the traditions and turmoil of ancient womanhood. Dinah’s tale begins with the story of her mothers: Leah, Rachel, Zilpah, and Bilhah, the four wives of Jacob. They love Dinah and give her gifts that are to sustain her through a hard-working youth, a calling to midwifery, and a new home in a foreign land. Dinah tells us of the world of the red tent, the place where women were sequestered during their cycles of birthing, menses, and illness; of her initiations into the religious and sexual practices of her tribe; of Jacob’s courtship with his four wives; of the mystery and wonder of caravans, farmers, shepherds, and slaves; of love and death in the city of Shechem; of her half-brother Joseph’s rise in Egypt, and of course her…
Review: The movie is loosely based on the life of Dinah and was written for a twenty-first century audience; therefore, it has a lot of historical inaccuracies, too many to even mention. But, if you are a biblical scholar, you will be able to point them out one after another.
While the film itself was wonderful story-telling, for me that is all it was. A fictional account of what biblical history says otherwise. I would have given this movie a lot higher score if the plot stuck to the original account of what Jacob and his family went through, but it did not.
Verdict: A rewrite of the Old Testament brought to you by Lifetime.
My Rating: 7 out of 10.
Stars: Nicole Kidman, Ben Whishaw, Michael Gambon, Peter Capaldi
IMDB Rating: 7.7
Plot: A young English boy befriends a talking bear he finds at a London train station. A live-action feature based on the series of popular children’s books by Michael Bond.
Quick Review: I am yet to see this, but, if the TV series was anything to go by, then this film will be a real treat 🙂
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Plot: In the action-comedy The Interview, Dave Skylark (James Franco) and his producer Aaron Rapoport (Seth Rogen) run the popular celebrity tabloid TV show Skylark Tonight. When they discover that North Korean leader Kim Jong-un is a fan of the show, they land an interview with him in an attempt to legitimize themselves as journalists. As Dave and Aaron prepare to travel to Pyongyang, their plans change when the CIA recruits them, perhaps the most unlikely candidates, to take out Kim Jong-un.
Review: After all the publicity I had seen of this film, I knew this was one I had to watch.
The Interview stars James Franco as Dave Skylark. A host of an Oprah type show, who interviews celebrities for the sake of ratings. There’s nothing spectacular about his TV talk-show at all. Guests come on and spill the beans on their inner most secrets. Such as Eminem who decides to ‘come out of the closet’ on Skylark’s show and announce that he is gay. In his cameo the rapper states; “I’m more shocked that people haven’t figured it out yet, I’ve been playing gay peek-a-boo for years. I’ve pretty much been leaving a gay bread crumb trail.”
Then of course there’s the scene when Rob Lowe comes out of his own closet and announces that for years he’s been wearing a toupee.
Seth Rogen stars as Skylark’s producer – Aaron Rapaport – who has been with Skylark from the very beginning. While Aaron wants the show to take on a more serious note, his ‘star’ does not share the same ambitions.. That is until it is revealed that the dictator of North Korea – Kim Jong-un – is Skylark’s ‘Number One Fan’. So what does any tabloid TV host do when they find out that a dictator is their “fanboy”? They decide to interview him to show the world who he really is.
You can guess what happens from here. In comes the busty Agent Lacey (Lizzy Caplan) of the CIA to recruit these two morons to assassinate Kim Jong-Un.
It is easy to see why any political leader would get their knickers in a knot when they are made a complete mockery of. But, some political leaders just deserve being made a fool of. In this case, the ass of the joke happens to be a dictator who apparently has no sense of humor at all.
While the film was funny in parts, the rest I didn’t really care for that much, and James Franco’s acting came across as his apparent desperate selfies…. Braindead.
The hype about this film didn’t exactly live up to expectations, and if the rumors were true about Jong-Un’s threats, then it is obvious that he really needs to get a life and not act like a jackass with a two by four stuck up his tight butt.
Verdict: Borat was funnier
My Rating: 6 out of 10
Watch Dave Skylark interview Iggy Azalea
Dumb & Dumber To
Stars: Jim Carrey, Jeff Daniels, Kathleen Turner
IMDB Rating: 6.5
Plot: 20 years since their first adventure, Lloyd and Harry go on a road trip to find Harry’s newly discovered daughter, who was given up for adoption.
Quick Review: 20 years is a long time to wait for the sequel (One cannot count the 2003 flop “When Harry Met Lloyd“). In this long awaited (for some) version, Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dunne set out to find Harry’s daughter, Penny (Rachel Melvin) – who was adopted out at birth by her mother, Fraida Felcher (Kathleen Turner).
The film starts out with Lloyd being locked up in a vegetative state in an asylum for two decades with Harry making regular visits until it is revealed that Lloyd had been playing a practical joke.
During the course of the film, Harry meets old flame, Fraida, and it is revealed that he has a daughter, whi was adopted out at birth. Of course, these two hero’s “man up” and take it upon themselves to go on a roadtrip to find Harry’s long lost daughter.
Some new jokes and gags in this one, as well as some of the original cast (Billy). Some will say that this one was not as funny as the first, but I have to say that this installment was a tad funnier and not as crass.
Some wonderful acting by Kathleen Turner and Rachel Melvin (who plays dimwitted Penny).
Verdict: Funny and Funnier To
My Rating: 6 out of 10